Joke Of The Day

[Rustys]

I got 17 out of 20.

 

[allheart55 (Cindy E)]

You will still feed me, right?

 

[allheart55 (Cindy E)]

 

[DSTM]

My dog ran off and I can't find him. The wife said "look harder"
So I shaved my head and got a tattoo
I still can't find him!

 

[allheart55 (Cindy E)]

 

[DSTM]

My neighbor came at me really aggressively, asking if I knew anything about her underwear disappearing from her clothes line.

I can tell you, I nearly shit her pants.

 

[allheart55 (Cindy E)]

 

[allheart55 (Cindy E)]

 

[DSTM]

Boy complains to his father: You told me to put a potato in my swimming trunks! You said it would impress the girls at the pool! But you forgot to mention one thing!

Father: Really, what?

Boy: That the potato should go in the front.

 

[allheart55 (Cindy E)]

 

[DSTM]

Cannibals never eat Divorced Women. They taste too bitter.

 

[allheart55 (Cindy E)]

 

[allheart55 (Cindy E)]

 

[allheart55 (Cindy E)]

 

[allheart55 (Cindy E)]

 

[allheart55 (Cindy E)]

 

[IJAC]

Check with coach Bill Belacheat of the Cheatriots he should know lol.
In case you don't get the reference it is the team that didn't win the super bowl this year.

 

[allheart55 (Cindy E)]

 

[allheart55 (Cindy E)]

 

[DSTM]

Guy goes to the Council for a job. The interviewer asks him - "Have you been in the armed forces?" Yes" he says "I was in the Falklands for three years." The interviewer says "That will give you extra points toward employment" and then asks "Are you disabled in any way?" The guy says "Yes 100%... a land mine blew my testicles off." The interviewer tells the guy "OK.I can hire you right now. The hours are from 8:00 AM . to 4:00 PM You can start tomorrow. Come in at 10:00AM ." The guy is puzzled and says "If the hours are from 8:00AM to 4:00 PM why do you want me to come in at 10:00 AM? " "look mate, this is a council job.........for the first two hours we all sit around scratching our balls...no point in you coming in for that, is there?