allheart55 (Cindy E)
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Joke Of The Day
- Thread starter allheart55 (Cindy E)
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DSTM
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I couldn't help but overhear two guys in their mid-twenties while sitting at the bar last night.
One of the guys says to his buddy: "Man you look tired."
His buddy says: “Mate I'm exhausted. My girlfriend and I have sex all the time. She’s after me 3 and 4 times a day. She wants sex before breakfast, sex before I go to work, when I come home she’s tearing my shirt off as I come through the door.
She’s got her hands down my pants after dinner. She even joins me in the shower almost every night. I just don't know what to do."
A fellow in his 50’s sitting a couple of stools down, also overheard the conversation.
He looked over at the two young men and with the wisdom of years said,
"Marry her. That'll put a stop to all that shit!"
One of the guys says to his buddy: "Man you look tired."
His buddy says: “Mate I'm exhausted. My girlfriend and I have sex all the time. She’s after me 3 and 4 times a day. She wants sex before breakfast, sex before I go to work, when I come home she’s tearing my shirt off as I come through the door.
She’s got her hands down my pants after dinner. She even joins me in the shower almost every night. I just don't know what to do."
A fellow in his 50’s sitting a couple of stools down, also overheard the conversation.
He looked over at the two young men and with the wisdom of years said,
"Marry her. That'll put a stop to all that shit!"
allheart55 (Cindy E)
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allheart55 (Cindy E)
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allheart55 (Cindy E)
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What happens when you tease an alligator......
allheart55 (Cindy E)
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allheart55 (Cindy E)
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allheart55 (Cindy E)
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Fill in the spots?
allheart55 (Cindy E)
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DSTM
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allheart55 (Cindy E)
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DSTM
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Can't remember if I have posted this exact image previous, however worth seeing again.
allheart55 (Cindy E)
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allheart55 (Cindy E)
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My husband and I discovered a few old papers with Laws of Life on them. I'll be posting some of them here from time to time.
1. A day without sunshine is like, night.
2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
3. I just got lost in thought; it was unfamiliar territory.
4. 42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
5. 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
6. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
7. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
8. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.
9. Honk if you love peace and quiet.
10. Remember half the people you know are below average.
1. A day without sunshine is like, night.
2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
3. I just got lost in thought; it was unfamiliar territory.
4. 42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
5. 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
6. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
7. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
8. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.
9. Honk if you love peace and quiet.
10. Remember half the people you know are below average.
DSTM
Active Member
New Doll.
More Laws of Life
1. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?
2. Nothing is fool-proof to a talented fool.
3. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
4. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
5. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
6. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
7. The early bird may get the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese.
8. Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back.
9. Mind like a steel trap - rusty and illegal in 37 states.
10. Quantum mechanics: the dreams stuff is made of.
1. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?
2. Nothing is fool-proof to a talented fool.
3. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
4. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
5. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
6. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
7. The early bird may get the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese.
8. Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back.
9. Mind like a steel trap - rusty and illegal in 37 states.
10. Quantum mechanics: the dreams stuff is made of.
DSTM
Active Member
allheart55 (Cindy E)
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allheart55 (Cindy E)
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