I found my German Shepherd, Hondo, with the neighbor's pet rabbit in its mouth. The rabbit was dead, and I panicked.. I took the dirty, chewed-up rabbit into the house. I gave it a bath, blew dried its fur, and put it back into the cage at the neighbor's house, hoping they would think it died of natural causes.

 

A few days later, the neighbor asked me, "Don, did you hear that Fluffy died?"

 

I said, "Um... no... what happened?"

 

The neighbor replied, "We found him dead in his cage one day, but the weird thing is that the day after we buried him, someone had dug him up, gave him a bath, and put him back into the cage. There are some real sick people out there!"

Many of the artists of the 60's are revising their hits with new lyrics to accommodate aging baby boomers who can remember doing the "mashed potato" as if it were yesterday. They include:

 

Bobby Darin --- Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' A Flash

 

Herman's Hermits --- Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Walker

 

Ringo Starr --- I Get By With A Little Help From Depends

 

The Bee Gees --- How Can You Mend A Broken Hip

 

Roberta Flack--- The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face

 

Johnny Nash --- I Can't See Clearly Now

 

Paul Simon --- Fifty Ways To Lose Your Liver

 

The Commodores --- Once, Twice, Three Times To The Bathroom

 

Procol Harem --- A Whiter Shade Of Hair ?

 

Leo Sayer --- You Make Me Feel Like Napping

 

The Temptations --- Papa's Got A Kidney Stone

 

Abba --- Denture Queen

"You haven't seen my teeth have you Wilma?"

 

Tony Orlando --- Knock 3 Times On The Ceiling If You Hear Me Fall

 

Helen Reddy --- I Am Woman, Hear Me Snore

 

Leslie Gore --- It's My Body, and I'll Cry If I Want To

 

And Last but NOT least...

 

Willie Nelson --- On the Commode Again